First off, I
apologise for missing yesterday! Between interviews, gigs and rehearsing I didn’t
get much time for writing.
interview went really well, I felt really good about it yesterday.
I didn’t get
is not the word. I have cried for hours today, I’ve been sick twice. 1 o’clock
this afternoon I was lying in bed sobbing my heart out. I’ve felt worthless,
useless, pretty much every other less out there...
headmaster sounded genuinely regretful on the phone. “If I had any other job,”
He said, “It would be yours; you were an exceptionally strong candidate.
Unfortunately another applicant had slightly more experience in the condition
the 1:1 child has.”
track of how many times I’ve been told I’ve lost a job to someone more
experienced. Unfortunately with so many people being made redundant it’s almost
impossible to gain experience in a field. It’s happening to graduates
everywhere. It feels like there is an entire generation being lost in this
Back when my
Grandparents were starting work they had an apprenticeship, went to college
then went into working as pharmacists. They had started their family by 23 and
went on to run their own successful business. These days it’s almost
impossible, you can’t even volunteer.
I have to
admit today is one of the worst days I’ve had for a while. I’ve had some awful
days over the last few years and they seem to keep coming. It is getting harder
and harder to stay strong and positive. Every knock I get I try to think of a
new plan even if it’s just so I have something to tell people when they ask me
what I’m up to.
staying strong. There will be something for me out there. And I have to believe
that one day I’ll look back on these dark days and I’ll realise that they’ve
turned me into the person I am. Someone with fortitude, someone who cares for
others, someone with the strength to keep my family together.
And through it
all I have him.
much else I can say. But I think this video will sum it up...